To put it delicately, what passes for normal in LA can seem a little bizarre when you move it out of context. While I'm away from home I tend to email back the odd observational nugget just to liven up the correspondence. Here are a few examples from last month.
"Coming up next. They're blind and armed with swords - two area high schools plan an unusual athletic event." (KNX 1070 NewsRadio)
"And after the break, we're gonna come back and talk about dressing babies up to look like Hitler." (Chelsea Lately, E!)
In the chiller cabinet in Gelson's - HE BREW - THE CHOSEN BEER. Flavours include Genesis Ale, Jewbilation, and Messiah Bold - "the one you've been waiting for"
And on the shelf in the Rite-Aid Drugstore, Glendale: ANTI MONKEY BUTT POWDER. "Relieve the friction of monkey butt and painful butt rash." The same company also produces Lady Anti Monkey Butt.
And then, of course, there's MIKE DIAMOND, THE SMELL-GOOD PLUMBER.